DMDU D.R.E.A.M. 4 (2024)

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Today, it's going to be very easy to feign ignorance because my familiarity with DMDU is really very limited. I've seen a few shows here and there, matches without context, but I'm far from an expert. The entirety of my knowledge comes down to: Joel Bateman, Callen Butcher, Damian Rivers, and for some reason, Gweedo. (Turns out I watched the first D.R.E.A.M. tournament where all of them are on the card.)

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ROUND 1

Match 1 – Kenzans, Forks, Cactus – Matt Tremont vs. Vixsin

Match 2 – Lighttube Lunacy – Michael Weaver vs. Valido (vs. Vic Craig)

Match 3 – FBTW – Terry Shaw vs. Joel Bateman

Match 4 – Thumbtacks & Bed of Nails – Xavier Black vs. Mad Dog

Recap

SEMI FINALS

FINAL

Final Thoughts

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It's November 2024 and we're in Melbourne. I have to remember that everything is upside down for this review.

Joel Bateman and announcer Jem Stone enter the ring in a very well-lit venue. That's certainly upside down. Many a US show suffers from taking place in a dimly lit gym, or – flashback to some outdoors shows I reviewed – in the dead of the night, illuminated by car headlights.

Bateman announces card changes which means very little to me. As of now, I don't know the card anyway, and odds are, I wouldn't know who is who either.

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ROUND 1

Match 1 – Kenzans, Forks, Cactus DMDU World Deathmatch Title Match – Matt Tremont vs. Vixsin (C)

Matt Tremont's outfit is not upside down. It's black as usual, shirt, long pants, although a white bandana. Commentary challenges me to fact check the claim that this is Tremont's 8th tournament. I'm pretty damn sure that's not correct, but I checked to see just how off the claim is. It's his 49th tournament in total, and he won 10 of them. This is also his Australian debut, so it can't refer to Aussie tournaments, and only his 2nd tournament in 2024, so it's not the 8th of the year either. Not a clue where that 8 could possibly come from.

With that out of the way: Vixsin baffles with several layers and little sportswear. Long jeans, proper white wrestling boots, then the top consists of... a white shirt over pink fishnet over black... what is this? Cricket padding? Shoulder armor? Plz halp, I'm not good with sportsball gear. She also has two titles, one of which will be on the line. In regards to fashion, this is quite bizarre. She clearly has the better colors, but otherwise it's all over the place. Tremont, despite also wearing long pants, is less covered. I'll call this a tie, with a prognosis that Vixsin has more potential to improve via blood splatter.

The weaponry includes not only the 'KFC'. There are also more Cs (chairs) and several bundles of Ls (lighttubes), and the Fs are suspended on an indeed upside down board in a corner. This wobbly contraption doesn't last long. Vixsin immediately attacks with chops and forearms and shoves Tremont into the corner.

She proceeds to stab him with a fork. Tremont fights back with a few elbows, then he too gets a fork and carves her forehead. Commentary is super into it and claims that everyone wants to see the stabbings. I feel like such a weirdo. To me, forehead carving is pure utility; to get the blood flowing early on, or later in a match as a rest hold. It's not exciting, just means to an end.

Finally, lighttubes and a kenzan cricket bat get involved. Tremont oversells like hell, and Vixsin hits him with an unambiguous baseball slide when he's out of the ring. Commentary calls it 'a... er, kick, a baseball slide type of action'. I understand that not everyone can be Kris Kloss, but in such moments, I want to believe that everyone could at least be a bit more Nick Maniwa.

The action now takes place outside the ring where Vixsin hammers kenzans into Tremont's forehead. Back in the ring, Tremont tries to headbutt a kenzan into her arm. It doesn't stick, and he gets a cricket bat with kenzans, but misses the swing. A bulldog from Vixsin is proclaimed to be the first wrestling move, then commentary remembers the baseball slide. Whichever you count as the first, wrestling is sparse in this match.

Vixsin sets up two chairs and puts cacti on it, but ends up going face first into them herself. The pinfall only yields a two, and Vixsin arms herself with a big cactus leaf, floors Tremont, and gives me hope for more wrestling with a senton which also results in a two count. Commentary isn't sure if that move is called a 'senton'. In my mind, I place a little lovingly framed photo of Nick Maniwa on my desk.

Now Vixsin has a good weapon. Finally! A bundle of skinny tubes with plastic forks, and it shatters nicely on Tremont's back. More forearm strikes, a lariat, Tremont kicks out of another two count. He ends up on a kenzan board after a Uranage, and I'm on the verge of a rant about intergender wrestling again. Vixsin isn't small or skinny; she does look like a credible threat. Just not to a guy of Tremont's size, and he has to jump quite a bit to make it look like a slam.

MFW: This match.

Her next slam looks better; Vixsin then gets chokeslammed onto chairs and cactus remains, and Tremont goes to the top rope. After a splash, he gets a three count and thereby wins the DMDU Deathmatch title that Vixsin held for about two years. I wonder how, because her showing here didn't really impress me. Nor did Tremont's, to be honest.

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Match 2 – Lighttube Lunacy – Michael Weaver vs. Valido (vs. Vic Craig)

Now we're talking! 'Heavy Set Violence' Michael Weaver wears a white shirt to black-white shorts, proper boots, and is even a little accessorized with a white-black face bandana. We have sportswear and we have white, and thereby a frontrunner.

And we're on a roll. 'The Supercharged' Valido also wears white. No sportswear, but both shirt and and pants are fully white, and he also has a red lucha mask. Street shoes though.

Let's tally things up. Weaver has shorts/sportswear, proper footwear, better exposure. Valido has more white, worse exposure, wrestling gear/mask, no proper footwear. I'm giving the victory to Weaver – who, side note, also brought the better weapon, a cricket bat with lighttubes vs. Valido's plain chair. Seems more appropriate for a Lighttube Lunacy match, and it sure needs a few more tubes to live up the latter. There are bundles of tubes in each corner which seems a bit sparse.

Instead of a ring bell to start the match, music hits and 'Deathmatch Reaper' Vic Craig appears. I know him; he's a kiwi and I've seen him before in ICWNHB, I believe. His apparent plan to insert himself into this match strikes me as bad news. He has a mouthful of tattoo needles, wears a black shirt, and while a spontanous self-insertion into a match is fine (no rant about the tournament structure warranted), I was looking forward to a big boi vs. skinny boi clash of styles. White shorts. Well, that's something. Is his hand in a caste? It looks like he's got a broken thumb. The black shirt comes off, but I notice that he is wearing street shoes. Valido has also removed his shirt, but I'm sticking with Weaver because it appears proper footwear isn't the norm around here, so I consider it more valuable in my judgement.

Finally, the match begins with Valido and Weaver smashing their weapons on Craig's head. Commentary praises the unprotected chair shot as 'awesome' (while - spoiler - worrying about headbutts and concussions later on. Pick a side, geez). He rolls out of the ring, and I do get the big boi vs. skinny boi dynamic with a futile shoulder block attempt from Valido. Now there's some actual wrestling, and Weaver highlights their hilarious size difference on every turn. I hope Craig stays out of this because this is fun. Weaver also gets the lighttubes involved, and Valido picks up the pace with a dive to the outside. Now Weaver is on the outside and Valido challenges Craig – indeed wrestling one-armed – in the ring to an exchange of punches.

Weaver returns and targets Craig now while Valido rolls out of the ring. Chops in the corners follow, Craig fights back, Valido returns to help out. They put Weaver through a lighttube log cabin with a double team move; Russian Leg Sweep from Craig, Front Dropkick from Valido. They team up again to smash skinny tubes held by Craig with a 619 from Valido on Weaver, but the alliance doesn't last. Craig smashes skinny tubes on Valido outside the ring and DDTs him onto a bundle.

Back in the ring, Craig carves up Weaver, headbutt-smashes tubes on him. The crowd chants 'you sick fuck', but it's unclear why. Commentary didn't see what happened either. Their guess is that Craig tried to stab Weaver's neck with a tube. It's also possible he put it in his mouth. Either way, when they leave the corner, Weaver is back in charge and Craig has something – likely a glass shard – sticking in his forehead. Valido returns. Weaver steals Craig's tattoo needles, Craig immediately takes them off him, only to be disarmed after a leg takedown that sees the needles in the hands of Weaver again.

And then in Craig's knee.

Seconds after, Valido gets caught in a Black Hole Slam by Weaver, but manages to kick out at two.

While Craig sells his knee, Weaver gets more tubes and smashes them on Valido. Things slow down; a bodyslam from Weaver against Valido fails to break a tube bundle, but it gets smashed over his head right away. More tubes are brought into the ring, Valido uses a handful to keep Craig out of the action, then smashes some on Weaver. After missing a corner splash, Weaver is down, as is Craig who hasn't done much since he took an arrow to the knee.

Valido brings a bucket to the ring and pours broken glass out. He then gets Craig involved again by putting him in the glass, but Craig gets up as soon as Valido climbs the top rope. He proceeds to smash tubes and a big log cabin is brought in. After some running back and forth, Craig returns to Valido and suplexes him off the top, and somehow that also floors Weaver who tried to catch Valido, presumably for a powerbomb. Everyone is down now, but Weaver gets up first. Valido pulls an Undertaker sit-up, and then all three are on their knees, armed with tubes, for a tube hop straight from the box.

Once the box is exhausted, Valido and Craig engage in a reversal duel. Craig wins despite his obvious struggles of being one-armed, only to get mowed down with a lariat by Weaver in the end. After that, Weaver gets a three count over both opponents.

This match was mostly fun, but it did have its lulls. It could have been shorter, it didn't really need a third guy; certainly not one handicapped with a caste. Still, it had the advertised lunacy in the end – tons of skinny tubes and broken glass, and there was a decent amount of wrestling as well.

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Match 3 – FBTW – Terry Shaw vs. Joel Bateman

'Grateful Dead' Terry Shaw made some good choices - white shirt, proper boots, matching belt, gusset plate tennis racket, a rake – and a less good one, namely the long ratty jeans. No wrestling/sportswear, but color-wise, this isn't the worst.

Joel Bateman leaves the fashion victory to his opponent without a fight by wearing all black (but to his credit, also proper boots). It doesn't end there though. On his way to the ring, he obtains a weedwhacker. Power tools are bad weapons, and I'm far more excited about Shaw's gusset tennis racket. It conjures up fond memories of the absolute bloodbath Alex Nabiev and Comrade Serp once achieved with a similar weapon at Blood & Sand. A weedwhacker, on the other hand, brings 'not starting in the first place' and 'rushed finishes' to mind. For that reason alone, I'm in Shaw's corner here. However, I must change my fashion verdict. Bateman removed the shirt and that leaves him with a big advantage in exposure.

Thankfully, the weaponry isn't limited to these three items. There are cinderblocks, a toaster, some kind of shrubbery, a big gusset plate pole of sorts, and other yet to be zoomed in on plunder. Does Shaw have a gun?

He does.

I assume it might be a paintball or dart gun, but it's certainly not what I expected from a FBTW in Australia. Where's all that dangerous flora and fauna? Give me a shark tooth surfboard or a man-sized venus fly trap! But then, who knows what the shrub they have can do? It's not out of the question that it is a hibernating kaiju and will wake up during the match.

The match opens with an exchange of punches, followed by some hard kicks to some backs. Bateman then introduces the first weapon by attacking with a cinderblock, and steals Shaw's magnificent gusset plate racket for a singular strike to the arm. NO! Don't throw the racket out of the ring! We still need it! Bateman won't listen. The racket is gone, and he now has a hacksaw to carve Shaw's forehead.

It continues with a pair of sickles. Shaw fights back with his rake and Bateman escapes to the outside. Pick up the tennis racket! It's right there! He does not because Shaw took revenge and stole Bateman's weapon, the weedwhacker, which he uses rather creatively by repeatedly attacking the legs. And he retrieves his racket! Yay! He makes more use of it than Bateman, too, attacking the back and the forehead.

Back in the ring, Shaw tries a first pinfall after an elbow drop, but only gets a two. The mystery shrubbery now comes into play. After a struggle, Bateman goes into it. Since commentary are Americans and don't know Australian vegetation, I had to identify the shrub by myself. It is a Thorny Saltbush, native to inland Australia, also known as Hedge Saltbush or Berry Saltbush. Other than being thorny and berry-growing, its defining feature is 'foliage can smell of stale fish'. Just in case you want to involve all senses in your imagination.

Shaw begins to arrange the cinderblocks, but when he tries to DDT Bateman onto his platform, a counter sees him legswept onto them instead. Bateman also gets a two, then smashes a cinderblock with another on Shaw's back for another two count. After a groin cinderblock smash, Bateman doesn't go for a pinfall and instead carves Shaw's head with the debris. He pours out the contents of a terracotta pot – terracotta shards – and a kneeling slugfest/headbutt duel ensues over them.

Someone in the audience – who looks suspiciously like a wrestler – gets up and shouts at Bateman, and while he's distracted, two guys in jeans and black shirts rush the ring. They beat down both Shaw and Bateman, the former with a hubcap to the head, the latter gets bombed onto a gusset cricket bat. Neither commentary nor I know who these guys are or what this is all about. They finally drag Shaw over Bateman which results in a three count. Audience Guy joins his buddies in the ring, they have a microphone and insult Bateman. Commentary figures out that their shirts identify them as the House of Frost, so at least I now know who to blame for this confusion.

Once Aussie 44OH finally vacated the ring, a new array of weaponry is added. A bed of nails, a barbed wire contraption often referred to as 'spider web' or 'venus fly trap', and a pit of something, possibly thumbtacks.

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Match 4 – Thumbtacks & Bed of Nails – Xavier Black vs. Mad Dog

The graphic identifies the first competitor as Vic Craig, but it's Xavier Black – who wears all white. I'm seeing a trend here. White shirt, white long pants, proper boots, and I'd call it an overall punk theme with a dyed mohawk and patches. He also has a title belt, but due to the wrong graphic, I don't know which. Outfit-wise, this is pretty covered up and low on wrestling/sportswear, but still fairly strong due to a clear theme and being all white. Commentary notes that this is the Mat Earth Society Championship. I don't have the slighest idea what that is, and it doesn't appear to be on the line.

Mad Dog is less covered up, wearing no shirt, but he also wears long jeans for an overall pretty gas station-y look. The belt matches the boots – at least the Aussies don't seem to have issues with that – but beyond that, it's just not great. I'll go with Black here despite Mad Dog's better exposure because he put effort into his look.

The match opens with a lock-up and chain wrestling that gets the thumbtacks involved, and ends with Mad Dog going face-first into the bed of nails. The wrestling continues after that; Mad Dog gets Black into a Camel Clutch which he enhances with a gusset plate to the head. It sticks at first try, as does the second. Shit outfit, but clearly competent!

After a brief stint with the bed of nails, Mad Dog tries a submission again, and ends up kissing the bed of nails for the second time. Black removes his shirt, flaunting his better deathmatch fashion sense, before slamming Mad Dog into the thumbtack pit.

Double clothelines into the thumbtacks follow, Mad Dog crawls for thumbtack cricket bats in the corner. Two things I need to say: First, cricket bats are superior to baseball bats. Their shape lends itself much better to attaching weapons. Second, I love how hellbound to stay on theme these guys are. The barbed wire thing, not mentioned in the stipulation, has gone completely ignored so far.

A duel with thumbtack cricket bats ensues, and ends with a powerbomb from Mad Dog against Black into the thumbtack pit. Punches and then fistfuls of thumbtacks get exchanged, then a test of strength follows, and Mad Dog gets suplexed into the pit again. Now both are down and counted on for a knockout, but get back up in time, and Mad Dog slams Black into their favorite pit. Really, that's dedication to the stipulation.

Mad Dog arranges the bed of nails under the barbed wire, then goes for a powerbomb. Black fights out of it and gets Mad Dog into a Sharpshooter, but ultimately lets go. In the most impressive spot of the round, Mad Dog picks him up for a Death Valley Driver through the barbed wire and onto the bed of nails. It's not the end of it though. Black crawls over, challenges Mad Dog, and gets a lighttube bundle over his head.

I'm not sure what commentary are smoking, but what follows is simply a piledriver, no 'jumping' involved, that gets Mad Dog a three count. I can only repeat: shit outfit, great performance. My preliminary MOTN.

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INTERMISSION, RECAP

The Best Dressed race is wide open today. There's a lot – and I mean a LOT – of white here, and maybe because of that, there's no strong frontrunner so far. Joel Bateman and Xavier Black, two of the stronger contenders, are eliminated which leaves Michael Weaver in the pole position. His advantages over runner-up Terry Shaw are sportswear and slightly better exposure due to the shorts, but it's a very close race. Had Black advanced, I'd definitely see him on the podium, and his showing might still get him there, depending how soaked the rest of the white shirt faction will be in the end.

The matches were entertaining, but not without flaws. Tremont vs. Vixsin was the only real weak one though. Lots of carving and punching, low on wrestling, and overall it just lacked oomph. The impromptu threeway was entertaining although I don't think adding a handicapped third was a great choice. A bit too long, a bit wonky due to the caste in some scenes. The third match started out good and only suffered from the interefence. Maybe it made sense to viewers who are in the loop. Without context, it just replaced a potentially good finish with mic time for three strangers. The last match then made up for that and delivered on all fronts (except Mad Dog's fashion sense) with a great weapon to wrestling balance all the way through, and a spectacular finish sequence.

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SEMI FINALS

Match 1 – FANtastic Four DMDU World Deathmatch Title Match – Michael Weaver vs. Matt Tremont (C)

Michael Weaver looks appropriately battered. No outfit change, but there is a different change right away. After realizing the staple gun he brought isn't working, he goes back through the curtain... and returns with the weedwhacker. Oh well. Good fashion sense doesn't automatically translate to good weapon taste.

No outfit change for Matt Tremont, other than his newly won belt. Appropriate battle damage, probably a bit stronger than Weaver's showing. Ultimately, it's still a lot of white and shorts against all black and long pants, and for these reasons, I'm giving the victory to Weaver.

The weaponry consists of fans, one in each corner, and for some reason, one or two panes of glass. On the outside, there's a table with thumbtack fans.

The match starts with a lock-up and an attempt to wrestle from Tremont who also can't get his arms around Weaver. Both attempt to push and shove each other into the fans, and after many evasions, it's Tremont who collides with the first, then the second. I can't help but think that he's overselling like crazy again, jumping and shaking like The Mountie just tazered him with his cattle prod in 1992.

And since I'm already pulling random comparisons out... Some reviews back, I ranted about Terex and his shocking lack of athleticism and sense of balance. Michael Weaver looks to be about the same weight, maybe even a little heavier, but is in full control of his mass. Terex should take a trip to Australia and take lessons from him.

Weaver is also in control of the match. After hammering a gusset plate into Tremont's head, both go out of the ring. Weaver gets gussets into his arm, but just pulls them out and sends Tremont against the ring post, then takes him for a walk to the merch area.

Here, he crushes and tears up a soda can and rubs it on gushing Tremont's forehead. When he returns from the merch table again, Weaver has a tiny barbed wire bat and attacks Tremont's arm with it. That thing just doubled and tripled its sales value.

Tremont's life flashes before his eyes.

Since they are already at a bar, they agree to a bar fight. Joel Bateman brings beer, then it's on – although not for long. After a few punches, they wander back to the ring and Tremont shatters a bundle of lighttubes on Weaver's back. They return to the ring where two fans and the panes of glass are still intact, but Weaver calls for chairs instead and receives. Tremont gets some chair shots, more gussets, and Weaver gets some in his head, too. Tremont tries a first cover, but only gets a two, and then goes for a pane of glass. He places it on Weaver, but the chair shot doesn't break it. Tremont tries again, this time putting the pane on Weaver's back, but the result is the same. Another two count follows, then Weaver gets back up and attacks Tremont with one of the remaining fans. Then it's his turn to try his luck with the glass pane, but also fails to shatter it with a chair on Tremont's head.

I really think it was a terrible idea to give them these small panes. They are too small to build a pillow fort and slam each other through them, so trying to break them with chairs is all they can do. And that's clearly not working. Short of shattering the panes on the ring posts, I don't see what would.

Anyway, Weaver seems to agree and abandons the panes in favor of the fan table on the outside. A struggle on the apron above ensues, Weaver gets Tremont in a Uranage position, but Tremont fights out of it and they return into the ring.

What I think would have been a great finish.

For a while, nothing happens and both just glare at each other from corner to corner. Weaver calls for something – 'Danny Havoc bats' with tube bundles. They get shattered and open a slugfest which Weaver wins with an elbow strike that floors Tremont. He gets a skinny tube bundle – another weapon that doesn't break in two splashes. Weaver finally resorts to smashing it over Tremont's head. Commentary reminds me that his title is on the line.

Weaver tries his luck with the other glass pane, placing it on Tremont, then he tries to climb the top rope. Tremont interrupts him with a chair throw, then gets the weedwhacker and attacks. The brief contact is enough to make Weaver fall backwards through the fan table, and Tremont gets a three count after that.

How far Weaver had to jump sideways for the actual finish.

The match had its moments, but the finish was sadly not one of them. The earlier struggle on the apron would probably have made for a better visual due to proximity and thereby better aim with the fan table. Still, I agree with commentary that Weaver made a fantastic impression in both his matches. Someone fly him in and book him against Judge Joe Dred, Shane Mercer, or JD Horror.

Or Terex, for hilarity.

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Match 2 – Guiding Light – Terry Shaw vs. Mad Dog

No outfit change for Terry Shaw, except for light battle damage. Same for Mad Dog. Neither outfit is great, but the verdict is pretty simple since Shaw wears a shirt and Mad Dog does not. The better exposure is the one thing that puts him ahead in a duel of ratty long jeans.

The stipulation translates to electrified lighttube boards, loose tubes, a cross-shaped gusset board and a cross-shaped razorblade board. Shortly after match begin, I also spot a thumback cricket bat.

The match opens with a furious Mad Dog charging at Shaw and immediately goes out of the ring. Mad Dog pulls out a box cutter and stabs away at Shaw's head, then carves him with it and some broken glass. Shaw doesn't stay down though and stalks Mad Dog to the merch area, armed with a fork. More stabbing and carving. It's box cutter vs. fork now. A part of me wonders what John Rare would think of this.

They return to the ring and Mad Dog distributes loose tubes on the canvas. Now we get to see some wrestling on the mat and in the lighttubes, with roll-up and submission attempts. That's unexpected, but not unwelcome. The gusset cross gets involved, and Shaw gets a first two count over Mad Dog on it. After a brief back and forth, Mad Dog manages to Death Valley Drive Shaw through the first electrified lighttube board. It takes him a long time to try a cover, and when he does, it's only good for a two. Mad Dog goes for a submission, but Shaw won't give up and instead Russian Leg Sweeps Mad Dog onto the gusset cross.

Now the razorblade cross comes into play, at first in the hands of Shaw, but Mad Dog tricks him and drop toes him onto the cross. Mad Dog follows up by putting the board on Shaw's back and elbow dropping onto it. The tide turns and Shaw catches Mad Dog for a Uranage (which commentary calls a 'chokeslam', not for the first time) onto the gusset cross which gets him a two count. Note to commentary: Chokeslam is when hand, Uranage is when arm.

Shaw now gathers pieces of drywall. To what end, I cannot say. He uses some to cover up the gusset cross, attacks Mad Dog with another, then piles a chair on his collection as well. Whatever his plan was, it doesn't come to pass. Mad Dog suplexes Shaw onto his pile for a two count. Commentary now muses if it was a 'fisherman buster suplex' or a 'perfectplex'. Personally, I'd go with 'fisherman's suplex' since neither of them is Curt Hennig.

"Where did the gussets go?!"

Mad Dog adds a bundle of tubes to the pile, then gets DDTed onto it for another two count. The tubes didn't break, but Mad Dog returns to his plan to force a submission by taking Shaw into a Cobra Clutch. Shaw tries to get out by shoving Mad Dog into the remaining electrified tube board, but Mad Dog won't release his hold. Shaw tries it again, still to no avail. In the end, Mad Dog wins by submission.

Good match, that's all I can say. Outfit-wise, Mad Dog has a long way to go, and that's really my only complaint. He still has the final against Tremont to go, but that likely won't change my verdict in regards to Mad Dog being the MVP of the show.

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FINAL

Shark Cage, Panes of Glass, Lighttubes DMDU World Deathmatch Title Match

Matt Tremont (C) vs. Mad Dog

No outfit change for Mad Dog. Surprisingly little battle damage, too, but the exposure might just be enough. Tremont is still more covered and all in black, but the battle damage is undeniably much better. Neither of these outfits will end up on the Best Dressed podium anyway, so I'll go with 'looking more like a finalist' here and give the victory to Tremont.

For some reason, commentary again muses that this is Tremont's 8th tournament, and that 'people at home can look it up and then bitch how much they suck even though they are really awesome'. Look, I know I'm a commentary snob, but the reality is: You guys are deathmatch podcasters. You are not random people from the street with no wrestling knowledge. This isn't cute. It's distracting. You should know what commonly seen moves are called. You should know that Matt Tremont, a deathmatch legend of 17 years who already had 3 or 4 tournament victories under his belt ten years prior, can't possibly only have been in 7 other tournaments before. Knowing this stuff, or at least quickly looking it up and pretending you knew all along, is your job. All you're accomplishing here is making me not want to listen to your podcast because you sound like incompetent fanboys.

Worse yet, the announcer lists all of the previous accomplishments of Mad Dog and Tremont. She's flaunting that a note with all that information exists in this very building. Maybe she should do play-by-play, too. Just sayin'.

Anyway. There's an actual shark cage in the ring. Now that seems appropriately Australian. Strangely, there is no shark in it though, but that's probably because it would be inside-out instead of upside-down. There are tubes or panes of glass in it. Two ring sides are fenced with lighttubes, there are three big panes of glass, several boxes of lighttubes, and – this is very satisfying – a contraption that looks like an upside-down table with panes of glass on the outside. Tremont's title is on the line.

Fast opening, and the tubes get smashed almost immediately, but by now I trust Mad Dog to keep up the wrestling to weapon balance. The action moves out of the ring, Mad Dog goes into the chairs, a slugfest ensues. Mad Dog is firmly in charge so far and even pulls out an old school ten punch before they wander back to the ring.

Back inside, the shark cage gets opened. Is this like a casket match? No. Tremont gets whipped into the cage and through the tubes, but nobody tries to trap him in there. Mad Dog tries to wrestle with a rolling pin for a two count, then closes the shark cage and climbs on top for a crossbody onto Tremont. Mad Dog gets a door and chairs to build a pillow fort, but ends up adding a pane of glass instead of the door. He puts Tremont on the top rope and for some reason climbs on Tremont's shoulders and naturally gets a Death Valley Driver through his contraption for a two count.

Tremont calls for the cage to be opened, then puts a pane of glass inside. Mad Dog sneaks up and Tremont crashes through the glass, and another two count follows. A kneeling slugfest with broken glass ensues, then Mad Dog gets backflipped over the top rope and through the upside-down table out of nowhere.

Back in the ring, Tremont only reaps a two count though. He goes to the top rope, but Mad Dog throws him down and gets a two count of his own. Now Mad Dog returns to the door and sets it up between chairs, then adds a second level of chairs and a glass pane. Again, he climbs the shark cage and this time, Tremont goes up as well.

Once on top, Mad Dog makes the curious choice to take Tremont in an Abdominal Stretch, only to get hiptossed down through his pillow fort, followed by a big splash from Tremont – which gets him a three count and the D.R.E.A.M. trophy.

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RAMBLING, FINAL THOUGHTS

Commentary, finally aware that this was Tremont's 49th tournament, muses that 'at least in the modern era', there's no other deathmatch wrestler as decorated as him. Which tells me they also don't know a thing about the previous generation. It's statistically not possible for the 'most decorated' deathmatch wrestlers of the early days to be more decorated than the current generation because there were far fewer deathmatch tournaments they could possibly have won.

For comparison, Mick Foley entered 23 tournaments in his career, Terry Funk was in 22 (many of which were not deathmatch in either case), Onita had 18 tournaments, Jun Kasai is at 33. The higher counts of people who were big before Generation Bulldozer are Masada (44) and Ryuji Ito (38), with a majority of their tournaments taking place after 2010. Saying the latter three are 'old generation' is a huge stretch, with Masada and Ito having entered tournaments in 2024, and Kasai's last being in 2021. The closest to Tremont's stats I can find are Mad Man Pondo (64 total tournaments, 8 victories) and Corporal Robinson (41 total, 7 victories) who I'd consider 'old school' (due to a relatively large number of pre-2010 tournaments), and John Wayne Murdoch (66 total, 10 victories) if I just look at most overall wins regardless of 'era'.

Anyway. Commentary was incompetent, but how about the tournament itself? That was pretty watchable. Michael Weaver, Xavier Black, and Mad Dog were the standouts, and to be blunt, the victory would have looked a lot better on the latter. As it was, it read as 'give the belt to Tremont to defend in the US, so it becomes a world title' - but that's not the case. The title has been a world title since 2022 already. I found Tremont's performance in all matches just strange. Tremont was always happy to put opponents over and make everyone look good, but the overselling was just absurd here. Grimacing, shadow boxing, shaking and jumping after simple things like headbutts and punches, so much so that it often looked comical and took away from the bigger spots. That was just out of place, except maybe for the match against Weaver where intentional comedy elements were also present.

I have a clear ranking for MOTN: Mad Dog vs. Xavier Black, closely followed by Mad Dog vs. Terry Shaw, then Tremont vs. Weaver. The MVP, as predicted, is Mad Dog with three matches in total, including the MOTN and a runner-up. The one imaginary trophy that's less clear is Best Dressed. Nobody really stood out as great, and looking back, I think Xavier Black – by virtue of having white, proper boots, and a clear theme – is my winner, with Michael Weaver (sportswear, white, proper boots, but relatively covered up) as the runner-up.

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